Everything in your life starts with you.
Self improvement will lead to life improvement. You are the foundation of your
life, the decisions that you make, the actions that you take, they are what create
your life. If your life is not the way you want it to be then only you can
change it. Yes you can get help from other people, but only if you accept their
It is often difficult for a person to accept the fact that they
are totally responsible for the condition of their life. I mentioned this
briefly in Fear of
Success but I will expand on it here.
Laying blame and shame
on other people or things is the fastest route to losing control of your life.
When you place blame outside yourself you have said that somebody else has more
control than you do. Essentially you act like a leaf in the wind, blown all over
the place by other peoples desires and whims. This will often lead to
you can not succeed if you are depressed. How can you change your life if
you give control to outside sources?
This does not mean that you
never let others control you, of course you do. When you get a job your boss
will tell you when to work, police officers will control your actions, so will
traffic signals. In fact when you look at it a large part of your life is
controlled by other people and things. You are still responsible, it is still
your decision whether to accept their control or not. Most of the time these
controls are good and you accept the control for the benefit of yourself an
One time I was stuck in traffic, there had been an
accident and a police officer was directing traffic onto a different route. When
I came up to him he waved for me to turn left, I refused to accept that control.
He started to get annoyed and waved even harder. Then I pointed to the nurse who
was pushing a wheelchair across the intersection, he understood.
What if I had blindly followed his control and hit those pedestrians, who would
have been responsible? But your honor, he made me do it, ha! If someone was
having a heart attack and you were driving them to the hospital would you sit
and wait at stop lights?
So the first major step in self improvement is accepting
full responsibility for your life. Read
Controlling the Uncontrollable
Are there circumstances that
you don't have control over? Apparently so, floods, fires, accidents etc. But
you are still in control of your reactions to them. You can let them defeat you,
or you can face them head on and handle them.
How about when
someone close to you dies, you do not have control over that and your initial
reactions are not likely to be controlled. Then what, do you give up, go into
such grief that you stop living your life? You have just ended two lives, maybe
even dishonored their memory by blaming them.
Wouldn't it be so
much better to thank them for the time you did have together. Would you give up
the memories of those times and say it would have been better to never have
known them, of course not. Honor their memory by living your life to the
fullest, even do some of they things that they always wanted to do.
In another page I will show you how much
more control you have over life than you realized, see
Visualization. For now let us continue with
Things to Do
There are many obvious steps to self
improvement, exercise, better diet, education and so on. The fact that you are
reading this shows that you are on the right track.
tackling some of the areas that you know you are weak in. I used to be very shy,
at social gatherings I would usually sit in a corner hoping that someone nice
would talk to me. I would have to know someone for quite a while before I would
initiate a conversation. The thought of talking to a crowd of people was
Shyness is a very uncomfortable and limiting
affliction. I decided to face it head on, I went to auction school. I could have
chosen a public speaking course or anything that would put me in front of an
audience. It took a little time but after running a few auctions and public
presentations I started to enjoy it. Now I love standing in front of a crowd, I
even took an acting part in a local play, it was great.
A simple self improvement
technique is to do something new every day or at least once a week. It does not
have to be big, take a different route to work, try some different food, shop in
a different store. If you continually try new things or change your routines
then any fears you may have about making major changes will be reduced. All of
this will help you increase your
which is so vital to being successful.
I am continually working on this website so there will be more pages to help in
your self improvement. See
You have already started by
reading these pages. Keep going, take control, make some changes and improve
your life. Remember your success depends on you.
Go to the top of Self
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